Relationship OCD

  • Relationship OCD (ROCD) is a subtype of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder characterized by obsessive doubts and fears about one's romantic relationship. Individuals with ROCD experience intrusive thoughts questioning their feelings for their partner, their partner's feelings for them, or the overall suitability of the relationship. These obsessions can lead to compulsive behaviors such as seeking constant reassurance, excessively analyzing the relationship, or comparing it to others.

  • These compulsions are driven by anxiety and doubt, providing temporary relief but ultimately reinforcing the obsessive doubts. Understanding and addressing ROCD involves recognizing the irrationality of these fears and implementing strategies to resist the compulsive behaviors, thereby reducing the obsessions and anxiety over time.

  • Doubts about feelings: Persistent worries about whether you truly love your partner or if your feelings are genuine.

    Doubts about partner's feelings: Intrusive thoughts questioning whether your partner truly loves you or is committed to the relationship.

    Compatibility concerns: Obsessive thoughts about whether you and your partner are truly compatible or right for each other.

    Physical or personality flaws: Fixation on perceived flaws in your partner’s appearance, behavior, or personality.

    Idealization: Obsessive comparison of your partner or relationship to an idealized or imagined perfect standard.

    Fear of infidelity: Unfounded fears that your partner might cheat or be unfaithful.

    Regret over past decisions: Intrusive thoughts about past decisions regarding the relationship and whether they were mistakes.

    Comparison to others: Constantly comparing your relationship or partner to other people’s relationships or partners.

    Future worries: Anxiety about the future of the relationship, including fears of breakup or divorce.

    Sexual doubts: Obsessive worries about sexual attraction to your partner or concerns about sexual compatibility.

  • Seeking reassurance: Constantly asking partners, friends, or family members for reassurance about the relationship or one's feelings.

    Checking behaviors: Repeatedly checking text messages, social media, or other communications for signs of problems or affirmations of love.

    Comparing: Comparing the current relationship or partner to past relationships, other people's relationships, or idealized versions of a relationship.

    Analyzing feelings: Excessively analyzing one's own feelings and thoughts about the partner or the relationship to ensure they are "right."

    Testing the relationship: Engaging in behaviors to test the partner's love or commitment, such as creating conflicts or asking hypothetical questions.

    Avoidance behaviors: Avoiding situations or conversations that might trigger doubts or anxiety about the relationship.

    Mental reviewing: Replaying past interactions or conversations in one's mind to look for signs of problems or validation.

    Researching: Looking up information online or in books about relationships, love, or commitment to find reassurance.

    Confessing: Frequently confessing doubts or perceived flaws to the partner to relieve anxiety.

    Perfectionism: Striving for the relationship or partner to meet unrealistic standards to ensure it is "perfect."